|
HANDLING YOUR TEEN CHILD'S
RESISTANCE
Don’t fret if your
teen resists. It doesn't always mean that
he is disobedient. When a teen resists, he
definitely becomes aware that you are listening
and at the same time he also develops an
awareness of his "inner voice" i.e.
feelings, desires needs etc. As a parent, try to
nurture the will to cooperate. What type of a
child do you have? He/ she could be any one of
the following or a combination.
A perceptive, sympathetic, vulnerable
child
An energetic lively teen but well planned
one
A sociable, easy-going, impressionable teen
|
If your child is
perceptive, sympathetic and vulnerable:
He needs
a lot of tender loving care, and lots of
understanding. Try to validate his pain rather
then ignore as, then, he will tend to magnify all his
woes and worries.
Reassure
him constantly that you are always with him.
When he resists again and again, tell him you understand.
Share an old experience and explain
that its OK to feel bad.
Don't keep pressuring your teen to
always participate in everything. Remember some
children participate by only listening and
watching and still learn as much as others.
|
|
If your child is
energetic, lively, and lives a reasonably planned life:
He will
cooperate with you normally when he knows in
advance what the plan/ programme is.
Your child will be prepared with a clear structure.
Always
make sure he is occupied as he hates just
sitting around doing nothing. An easy way is to
start something and ask him to join in.
Never
put your child down in public; do it privately. Your child will
appreciate you for it!
Don't make too many changes as he
cannot cope with big changes and prefers a
schedules sometimes.
|
|
If your child is sociable, easy-going and impressive, is easily distracted and
can't concentrate on any one topic for a
long time:
Use this
to your advantage by actually distracting him
when he tries to resist. Once he is distracted,
lead your teen in the path you desire. Leading doesn't mean instructing;
but suggesting to your child where he/ she can make their own decisions.
Don't ever refuse the
child outright, as this is bound to attract a lot of resistance.
Intelligently mould your child into your decision,
making them feel as if it is their own decision.
|
|
